Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Milwaukee Dictionary: RIVERWESTED

Riverwested (riv-ur-whest-id): // adj. // : having an unwanted hippie and/or pseudo-spiritual experience that changes your day for the worse. This can include but not limited to uninitiated conversations about Chanting and Yoga Classes, hearing about inexpensive sabbaticals with the hanging implication that they kept the money, the virtues of India, the virtues of wearable oils, openly celebrating dark beers, and/or how inexpensive their Guatemalan handmade item was. Visual occurrences can include but not be limited to seeing a person wearing a beret, tables of 17 clustered together in coffee shops to discuss reappointing board members to local eco-associations, white-haired ponytails and Tevas, seeing Kerry and Obama stickers on back of 1980s Volvo station wagons.

ME: I pulled the door open to (insert Riverwest coffee shop name) and my hand smelled like Patchouli from the handle.

YOU: Man, that sucks!

ME: I know! I washed my hands 3 times to try to get the stink off. There was still a lingering odor so I ate my bagel with one hand as a precautionary measure.

YOU: Dude, you got Riverwested. Hard.

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